S02E18: Chick Flicks

Transcript

00:00:00 Hurst
Best quotes?

00:00:00 Hurst
Obviously, nobody puts baby in the corner.

00:00:03 Squirrell
She wasn't in a *beep* corner, she was just sat by the wall.

00:00:06 Squirrell
It was originally going to be on a square table, they changed it to a round one, she's no longer in the corner. *beep* *beep*

00:00:12 Hurst
Excellent.

00:00:15 Harriet
Top Five face-off contains adult themes and language that some people may find offensive.

00:00:20 Harriet
Listener discretion is advised.

00:00:22 Squirrell
He's Matt Hurst.

00:00:23 Hurst
He's Matt Squirrel.

00:00:24 Squirrell
And this is Top Five Face-Off, the official world rankings of everything.

00:00:28 Squirrell
What are we ranking today, Hurst?

00:00:30 Squirrell
Well Squirrel.

00:00:31 Squirrell
Today, we're going to be ranking the top five chip flicks, coming right up after this.

00:00:36 Robo-Katy Perry
If there's more than one, then there's a best and a worst.

00:00:40 Robo-Katy Perry
If there's more than five, call Squirrel and Hurst.

00:00:44 Robo-Katy Perry
It's the top five face-off.

00:00:46 Robo-Katy Perry
Actual facts.

00:00:47 Robo-Katy Perry
It's the top five face-off.

00:00:50 Robo-Katy Perry
The facts are exact.

00:00:59 Hurst
Good morning, good afternoon, good evening, or good night.

00:01:02 Hurst
Rankers, welcome back.

00:01:04 Hurst
And for any new rankers, welcome to the show.

00:01:07 Hurst
Hello.

00:01:08 Hurst
Squirrel, for all our new rankers, why don't you tell them what we do here and why we do it?

00:01:12 Squirrell
We rank ****.

00:01:14 Squirrell
Our Patreons choose stuff and we pick randomly and we rank ****.

00:01:18 Squirrell
And then people vote on our website, www..topfivefaceoff.co.uk.

00:01:22 Squirrell
And that becomes the official world ranking of whatever the **** we're ranking is.

00:01:30 Hurst
Yeah, sounds about all right.

00:01:31 Hurst
But being British, we don't like to get straight to the point.

00:01:34 Hurst
We like to beat around the proverbial bush.

00:01:37 Hurst
So how's the weather been, Screw.

00:01:39 Squirrell
Sunny, mate, as evidenced by your glowing face.

00:01:43 Hurst
Yes, I do look radioactive, Rankers.

00:01:45 Hurst
I do.

00:01:46 Hurst
I'm not actually as red as I look, but it's a little bit disconcerting.

00:01:50 Hurst
If in Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory, Violet Beauregard had chewed on a red currant instead of a blueberry flavoured chewing gum, she would have probably started looking a lot like I do right now.

00:02:03 Hurst
It's actually a little bit distracting, but we're going to try and power through.

00:02:07 Hurst
But yes, I have been out in the sun, but I'm not as burnt as I look.

00:02:10 Hurst
And it's been flipping glorious.

00:02:11 Hurst
Yesterday was absolutely

00:02:13 Hurst
boils.

00:02:14 Hurst
My friend Polly was up for the weekend and we went out to a pub in Retford that was right on the canal and sat there drinking craft beers and chatting to people and it was like yeah man feels like full on summer and we're still only in April so good times were had.

00:02:29 Squirrell
Yes it's true although there is a May is soon we're quite near the end of April if you're coming to this a bit later on rankers and if you are remember you can't vote on this one because this one's already finished but you could jump to the very latest episode and you'll be able to vote

00:02:43 Squirrell
on that one, so don't forget.

00:02:45 Hurst
Good point.

00:02:46 Squirrell
Yeah, maybe they just searched up something about chick flicks, because that's what we're doing today, and it gave them this.

00:02:52 Squirrell
That would be nice if that happened.

00:02:54 Squirrell
Although, sorry if we're about to just utterly steamroll what the **** a chick flick is, because honestly.

00:03:01 Hurst
It's a bit like the big man action movie thing.

00:03:03 Hurst
I think it's a bit worse than that.

00:03:04 Hurst
You kind of feel you know what it is.

00:03:08 Squirrell
You know what it is, but it can be almost anything really.

00:03:11 Squirrell
Not almost, you know what I mean though.

00:03:12 Hurst
For me, I felt as I went through them, there were certain things that like the lead character pretty much has to be, at least if it's co-leads, one of them has to be female.

00:03:23 Hurst
And I felt like if it was a pure male lead, it stopped being a chick flick.

00:03:29 Hurst
It was just another flick.

00:03:30 Hurst
I mean, I didn't write any of these specifics down, but that was just kind of the feel I had about it as I went through it.

00:03:35 Squirrell
Yes, and things like, much as I would

00:03:38 Squirrell
I'd love to include aliens, but absolutely isn't one.

00:03:41 Squirrell
But it almost could be, but there's something saying it's not because it's about shooting things and that's not chick flicking.

00:03:47 Squirrell
It doesn't seem to matter so much what it's about.

00:03:49 Squirrell
It's more of a vibe.

00:03:50 Hurst
Yeah, I think you're right.

00:03:53 Hurst
I think you're right.

00:03:53 Hurst
It's, anyway, the rankers can let us know with their joy or their ire.

00:03:59 Hurst
This is true, whether we are doing the right thing or not.

00:04:02 Hurst
And we'll find out all about that in the notes.

00:04:04 Hurst
We've got a couple of other bits of preamble to go through as well.

00:04:08 Squirrell
I prematurely...

00:04:11 Squirrell
spoke.

00:04:13 Hurst
Yes, so what's been going on?

00:04:14 Squirrell
What's been going on, Hurst?

00:04:17 Squirrell
Nothing much since we talked about 80s/90s cartoons, I don't think.

00:04:23 Squirrell
Has anything super exciting happened in the world of Squirrel?

00:04:28 Squirrell
I had a rough old week.

00:04:30 Squirrell
Here we go, here's a week for you.

00:04:32 Squirrell
So I normally work from home, excellent thumbs up, up thumbs.

00:04:38 Squirrell
But I didn't this week.

00:04:39 Squirrell
We were doing some kind of whole company or large part of the company stuff in London on Monday and Tuesday.

00:04:44 Squirrell
I was in London.

00:04:45 Squirrell
I had Wednesday off because I went to see The Prodigy, this little band you might remember from when you were younger.

00:04:51 Squirrell
It was all right.

00:04:52 Squirrell
And 13,000 other people turned up to watch them too.

00:04:54 Squirrell
That was fun.

00:04:55 Squirrell
But that was in Leeds.

00:04:56 Squirrell
And I live in Bedford.

00:04:58 Squirrell
And if you're outside of the UK or you just don't know how far Bedford is from anywhere, because where the **** is Bedford?

00:05:03 Squirrell
I agree.

00:05:04 Squirrell
I drove about 500 miles that day because I drove there

00:05:07 Squirrell
I drove back again.

00:05:07 Squirrell
Why the **** do I drive back again?

00:05:09 Squirrell
Well, because I was back in London on Thursday morning for another work thing.

00:05:13 Squirrell
So I got back from Leeds around about 3 and I was in a taxi by 7 to go back to London the next day.

00:05:23 Hurst
**** that ****.

00:05:25 Hurst
No, absolutely not.

00:05:27 Hurst
I couldn't cope with that at all.

00:05:28 Hurst
I mean, as a man who typically goes to bed, now that I'm having to get up at half six again to go to work, I typically go to bed around 9:00.

00:05:37 Squirrell
Good Lord.

00:05:37 Squirrell
How do you get anything?

00:05:38 Squirrell
No wonder we're behind on the ******* Patreon special.

00:05:42 Squirrell
How do you get anything done?

00:05:44 Hurst
I just find I'm really tired because it's not just that, you know, I'm up at half six.

00:05:49 Hurst
It's exhausting being a TA.

00:05:51 Hurst
I mean, I assume it's the same in regular mainstream schools, but in a special needs school, I spend so much time just chasing kids around who've decided they're not going to be in lessons and they're just going for a walk around the grounds and I have to run off after them.

00:06:05 Hurst
And then at playtime, they all want to play.

00:06:07 Hurst
tag, which is called Tig up here.

00:06:09 Hurst
They run up and hit me and say, Tig, and then I have to chase them.

00:06:13 Hurst
And they haven't really cottoned on to the rules of Tig because one of them are up, I go Tig and slap me and then run off.

00:06:20 Hurst
And just as I'm about to start chasing, another one run up and slap me and go Tig and run off as well.

00:06:26 Hurst
And then a third might do the same thing.

00:06:28 Hurst
It's like,

00:06:29 Hurst
I don't know if you guys grasp the concept.

00:06:32 Hurst
Yeah, they know to tick and run away, but then if I haven't reacted quickly enough to chasing them, they'll all come and tick me some more.

00:06:40 Squirrell
Someone else just takes up the banter.

00:06:41 Hurst
Of course, it's exhausting.

00:06:43 Hurst
I've had to set the rules at lunch break.

00:06:45 Hurst
I don't play tick.

00:06:47 Hurst
That's just the rules.

00:06:48 Hurst
But anyway, it's exhausting between chasing them around when they're supposed to be in class and chasing around when they're not supposed to be in class.

00:06:55 Hurst
I get home and I'm absolutely pooped.

00:06:57 Hurst
So by 9:00, I can barely keep my eyes.

00:06:59 Hurst
I need a good night's sleep to go back in and crack on with it.

00:07:03 Squirrell
We call it Tig as well.

00:07:05 Squirrell
Did you?

00:07:05 Squirrell
Here in Bedford, yeah.

00:07:07 Hurst
It was it.

00:07:08 Hurst
We played it.

00:07:09 Squirrell
Yeah, we would also call it that.

00:07:11 Squirrell
It was interchangeable.

00:07:11 Squirrell
You were it in the game of Tig.

00:07:14 Hurst
Yeah, we never said tag.

00:07:15 Hurst
It was always it.

00:07:16 Hurst
But up here, it's very Tig focused.

00:07:19 Hurst
I don't know if that's just an article or not.

00:07:20 Hurst
But anyway, I feel like this is probably not fascinating stuff.

00:07:24 Hurst
But I'll tell you something.

00:07:25 Hurst
I've made a note on what's been going on my end.

00:07:27 Hurst
You know, you've got your notes.

00:07:30 Hurst
and your apps.

00:07:30 Hurst
I was having a little scroll through that to see what was on there, so if there's anything that I could just delete.

00:07:35 Hurst
And I came across one.

00:07:36 Hurst
I had just, it took me a while.

00:07:37 Hurst
I couldn't figure out why I'd written it.

00:07:40 Hurst
And this is what the note said.

00:07:42 Hurst
Don't you just want to get your tweezers out and sort out that wedgie?

00:07:45 Hurst
This was a note I'd written.

00:07:47 Hurst
I was like, why have I written that note to myself?

00:07:50 Hurst
What's happening?

00:07:51 Squirrell
What was going on?

00:07:53 Squirrell
If only you had a podcast at the time, you may well have talked about it.

00:07:56 Hurst
Yeah.

00:07:56 Hurst
But what it was, I remembered, we were

00:07:59 Hurst
in a cafe or something, Carly and me.

00:08:02 Hurst
And this woman, how the trend for women's leggings is now that they haven't.

00:08:08 Hurst
So it looks like their **** is eating some of the leggings.

00:08:11 Hurst
Like, yes, they kind of they incredibly tight.

00:08:14 Hurst
Stitch it around.

00:08:14 Hurst
So it basically looks like, you know, they're almost naked.

00:08:18 Hurst
You can see the full on **** cheeks in the crack.

00:08:20 Hurst
And I was just marvelling at how this woman had gone out and basically her **** was devouring her leggings.

00:08:27 Hurst
And I wanted to tell Carly and laugh about it.

00:08:29 Hurst
but obviously the bookman was standing right there, so I had to write it in my notes.

00:08:33 Squirrell
And then show it to Carly.

00:08:34 Hurst
Yes, and show it to Carly, so she could snicker as well, like the terrible people we are.

00:08:39 Hurst
But yeah, it was funny just looking through my list, going, what the hell was I thinking when I wrote that note to myself?

00:08:45 Hurst
It wasn't, it turned out it was a note to Carly, so you know, that made me laugh.

00:08:48 Hurst
I thought, Rankers, I love that.

00:08:50 Hurst
Gripping your **** anything?

00:08:51 Hurst
Anything verbing your noun these days?

00:08:54 Squirrell
Pretty chill.

00:08:56 Squirrell
Has anything annoyed me?

00:09:00 Squirrell
Is it interesting?

00:09:01 Squirrell
No, no, nothing has annoyed me.

00:09:04 Hurst
Okay, good stuff.

00:09:06 Hurst
So shall we talk about what happened last week?

00:09:08 Squirrell
Let's hit up some 80s and 90s cartoon results, shall we?

00:09:13 Squirrell
Well, let's start with, as we always start with, whoever gets in there first name, this time it is.

00:09:19 Squirrell
Meg 98.

00:09:20 Hurst
Oh, Meg 98.

00:09:21 Hurst
That makes a nice change.

00:09:22 Squirrell
Well done, Meg.

00:09:24 Squirrell
I thought for sure Squirrel was going to drop He-Man at #1, but D plus 3M sealed it for me.

00:09:30 Squirrell
Also, the Starscream voice had me getting some very strange looks on the silent train as I ugly laughed in front of a bunch of people.

00:09:37 Squirrell
Excellent, says Meg 98.

00:09:39 Squirrell
Thank you, Meg.

00:09:40 Squirrell
Brilliant.

00:09:41 Squirrell
She is not the only one to mention Starscream, but we'll come back to that.

00:09:44 Squirrell
Here is a vote for me, which is anonymous.

00:09:46 Squirrell
It just says all hail Megatron.

00:09:48 Hurst
Yeah.

00:09:49 Squirrell
Hold for Davpaz.

00:09:51 Squirrell
Damn your eyes for making me choose between Transformers and Turtles.

00:09:55 Squirrell
In the end, I had to waver to Hurst as Cities of Gold is better than Dogtanion.

00:10:00 Squirrell
It's true.

00:10:01 Squirrell
It might not be ******* true, Davpaz.

00:10:03 Squirrell
We'll let you know in a minute or two.

00:10:05 Squirrell
Yeah.

00:10:06 Squirrell
And Skrill cheated with Johnny Bravo tut-tut.

00:10:08 Squirrell
Eh, maybe, but you're the only person to mention it, so I don't get.

00:10:11 Squirrell
All righty.

00:10:12 Squirrell
It's Ohio, says presumably Ohio.

00:10:16 Squirrell
Thundercats takes it for me, brings back memories of all my friends laughing because Tigra was my favourite.

00:10:22 Squirrell
Come on, Tigra wasn't anyone's favourite man.

00:10:25 Squirrell
Also, Peter Cullins was the voice of Oximus Prime and Venger.

00:10:31 Squirrell
Yes, I think I mentioned that, but very quickly while you were laughing at something.

00:10:35 Squirrell
Keep on rankings is a high OPS.

00:10:37 Squirrell
Love the Starscream voice and Hearst's key story.

00:10:40 Squirrell
Yes, the key story.

00:10:41 Squirrell
Had me pressing myself.

00:10:43 Squirrell
Yes.

00:10:44 Squirrell
Here is a vote for you, Hearst.

00:10:47 Squirrell
This was a great list.

00:10:48 Squirrell
Plus I can't not vote for Batman.

00:10:51 Squirrell
Cheers, Kov.

00:10:52 Squirrell
Thanks, Kov.

00:10:52 Hurst
Yeah, that's true, Kov.

00:10:53 Hurst
Can't not vote for Batman.

00:10:54 Hurst
I think it's actually physically impossible for him.

00:10:58 Squirrell
Someone else loves some Batman.

00:11:00 Squirrell
BTAS is so ******* good.

00:11:03 Squirrell
Kevin Conroy, that baller opening sequence with the elfin inspired music, putting that number one guaranteed the vote.

00:11:09 Squirrell
Best chick flick is chicken run, obviously, says Gaz Chap.

00:11:15 Squirrell
The vote for me simply says Muskerhounds for the win.

00:11:17 Squirrell
That's from Kern.

00:11:18 Squirrell
Thank you, Kern.

00:11:20 Hurst
I mean, that's done nicely for people.

00:11:22 Hurst
I wasn't sure it was probably going to go one of two ways.

00:11:24 Squirrell
People would go like, whatevs or like, nostalgia, boom, boom, boom.

00:11:29 Squirrell
It's all pretty nostalgia, right?

00:11:31 Squirrell
Well, let's see what this ranker thinks.

00:11:32 Squirrell
Very, very, very close call on these.

00:11:35 Squirrell
In the end, I had to go with Squirrel, who had the cartoons with the better theme songs.

00:11:39 Squirrell
But for shame on both of you for your Transformers knowledge.

00:11:42 Squirrell
In the first episode, they all did change into

00:11:45 Squirrell
We had alien ships and cannons on Cylotron, but they crashed on Earth thousands of years ago.

00:11:50 Squirrell
Then when they were awoken, their computer made them transform into Earthlings for disguise reasons.

00:11:56 Squirrell
You could have easily done a top 10 here.

00:11:58 Squirrell
The 80s were peak for cartoons.

00:11:59 Squirrell
That's from Moneyslinger.

00:12:00 Squirrell
Thank you, Moneyslinger.

00:12:02 Squirrell
I'm not the only person to point out the Transformers facts that actually I ****** ** but then you didn't correct me.

00:12:08 Hurst
Well, you know what?

00:12:09 Hurst
That's why we have the Malcolms.

00:12:11 Hurst
We embrace Malcolm culture here.

00:12:13 Squirrell
We do.

00:12:14 Squirrell
We want to know what we get wrong, Malcs.

00:12:16 Squirrell
Let us know.

00:12:17 Squirrell
Not in our general life choices.

00:12:19 Squirrell
Gear Lord, back off, but on this podcast, we would like to hear from you.

00:12:25 Squirrell
tough choice this week, as everyone knows the top five is actually Doctanion, Mysterious Cities of Gold, Mask, Dungeons and Dragons, and Thundercats.

00:12:34 Squirrell
So I had to go with the person with the most correct injuries.

00:12:36 Squirrell
That's from Trooper, and that person is me.

00:12:38 Squirrell
I think I had three of them, and you had two of them.

00:12:41 Squirrell
You had so Doctanion, me, Mysterious Cities of Gold, you, Mask.

00:12:45 Squirrell
Did you say Mask?

00:12:46 Hurst
Me?

00:12:47 Hurst
Wasn't it?

00:12:47 Squirrell
Yes, Dungeons and Dragons and Thundercats were both me though.

00:12:50 Squirrell
I used Dungeons and Dragons as well.

00:12:52 Squirrell
Maybe it's because I had a higher up.

00:12:54 Squirrell
Who knows?

00:12:55 Squirrell
Who knows?

00:12:56 Squirrell
We checked your maths, Trooper, and found it wanting.

00:13:00 Squirrell
Now, I'll be honest, this one was almost a tough call.

00:13:04 Squirrell
Interesting.

00:13:05 Squirrell
The three Muskerhounds nearly had me voting for Skrull this week.

00:13:08 Squirrell
Aw.

00:13:08 Squirrell
Because that feature takes me straight back to being six years old, sitting round at Hayley Fox's house, watching on the telly, absolutely convinced that one day I was going to marry her.

00:13:19 Squirrell
She had no idea, of course.

00:13:20 Squirrell
But look, what Hayley didn't know, and what Screw needs to understand now, for ****** sake, is that this is the season of Hearst, and it's an unstoppable force.

00:13:29 Squirrell
It cannot be slowed down.

00:13:31 Squirrell
It certainly cannot be derailed by something as trivial as a six-year-old's crush on a classmate.

00:13:36 Squirrell
So, sentimental journey aside, it's a vote for Hearst for me from the Vision.

00:13:41 Squirrell
****** sake.

00:13:41 Hurst
Shout out to Hayley Fox.

00:13:43 Hurst
Get in touch.

00:13:43 Hurst
Let Vision know that you liked him too.

00:13:46 Squirrell
Hayley Fox is a pretty- It's a great one.

00:13:49 Squirrell
right and now Hayley Fox yeah definitely possibly you know hopefully older than six now but.

00:13:58 Hurst
You don't hope so yeah.

00:14:00 Squirrell
Good one vision good one

00:14:03 Squirrell
now I'm just laughing randomly because we just chopped a load of stuff out.

00:14:07 Squirrell
Anyway, let's carry on.

00:14:08 Squirrell
Very close this week, but Squirrel nudged it.

00:14:11 Squirrell
I'm very much looking forward to the live action He-Man film in the summer from Katie.

00:14:15 Squirrell
Thank you, Katie.

00:14:17 Squirrell
Pretty sure that used to say love, Katie.

00:14:19 Squirrell
I don't know what we did to upset her.

00:14:20 Hurst
Oh, it must have said something.

00:14:24 Squirrell
Vote for Hurst, but love, and then...

00:14:28 Squirrell
Listen, I don't know who you are, Anonymous, but you've typed out the entire Free Musket Hounds theme tune here.

00:14:35 Squirrell
Thank you very much for writing all of that into a tiny comment box.

00:14:38 Squirrell
Voting for Hurst.

00:14:40 Squirrell
All right, that's a lot of comments.

00:14:41 Squirrell
That'll do for this week.

00:14:42 Squirrell
Hurst.

00:14:43 Hurst
Feels like you had a few more than me, which I think.

00:14:46 Squirrell
But as we know that it usually does though, doesn't it?

00:14:50 Squirrell
usually does.

00:14:51 Hurst
And you do need this one because I think we're on a 3P or something at the minute.

00:14:54 Hurst
So you need some.

00:14:55 Squirrell
Yeah, you're the stats guy.

00:14:56 Hurst
I can't remember.

00:14:56 Hurst
It's harder to keep up with it than it's every other week.

00:14:59 Hurst
When it was every week, it was easier to keep tabs.

00:15:01 Squirrell
It certainly wasn't easier to do the editing though.

00:15:04 Squirrell
Well, putting out your misery, Hurst.

00:15:06 Squirrell
I got 31 and I got 25.

00:15:08 Hurst
Oh, decents.

00:15:10 Squirrell
So, yeah, no big numbers.

00:15:13 Squirrell
But who wants to hear the official top five '80s and '90s cartoons?

00:15:19 Hurst
I know I do.

00:15:21 Squirrell
At number five is Johnny Bravo.

00:15:25 Squirrell
At number four, the mighty Thundercats.

00:15:30 Squirrell
At number three, Dungeons & Dragons.

00:15:34 Squirrell
At number two...

00:15:35 Squirrell
Teenage Mutant Hero slash Ninja Turtles.

00:15:39 Squirrell
And at #1, Dogtanian and the Free Musker Hounds, the greatest 80s slash 90s cartoon of all time.

00:15:48 Squirrell
Very good.

00:15:50 Squirrell
Well done.

00:15:51 Squirrell
I'm aware he was.

00:15:51 Hurst
I can't say that.

00:15:53 Hurst
It upsets me.

00:15:54 Squirrell
So many good cartoons to choose from.

00:15:55 Squirrell
Could have been a top ten.

00:15:57 Squirrell
But that is the past Hurst.

00:16:00 Squirrell
Shall we look toward the future?

00:16:02 Squirrell
Do you want to rank some chick flicks?

00:16:05 Squirrell
Absolutely, I do.

00:16:10 Squirrell
Hurst, you've been regularly going first, haven't you, over the last few episodes?

00:16:16 Hurst
Except for that time when you had Bluetack on the koi for a couple of weeks and it chose you.

00:16:19 Squirrell
A couple of weeks and it's coming up tails.

00:16:22 Squirrell
Heads for her.

00:16:23 Squirrell
Squirrels have tails.

00:16:24 Squirrell
Non-Patreons may not realise that Hurst pointed out that squirrels also have heads on one of our Patreon episodes.

00:16:30 Squirrell
Hadn't really thought about that before, but he's absolutely right.

00:16:32 Squirrell
Anyway, let's flip it.

00:16:35 Squirrell
Oh, squirrels have tails!

00:16:37 Squirrell
And I will leap straight in, Hurst, with my #5, a comedy movie from 2010, directed by Will Gluck, called Easy A.

00:16:48 Squirrell
Easy A is an excellent film.

00:16:50 Squirrell
It stars Emma Stone as Olive Pendergast.

00:16:53 Squirrell
I'm pretty sure that's how she's sort of naming the film.

00:16:55 Squirrell
I didn't rewatch it for this because I just remember it being great.

00:16:57 Squirrell
It's loosely inspired by The Scarlet Letter.

00:17:00 Squirrell
But basically what happens is Olive becomes the subject of school gossip because she lies about losing her virginity.

00:17:06 Squirrell
And it's all about reputation in schools and **** shaming and stuff like that.

00:17:11 Squirrell
And Emma Stone is absolutely ******* great in it.

00:17:14 Squirrell
It's only a little film.

00:17:15 Squirrell
It had an $8 million budget.

00:17:17 Squirrell
It made $75

00:17:19 Squirrell
Good job.

00:17:19 Squirrell
Stonehatch got a Golden Globe nomination for Best Actress in a Comedy or Musical.

00:17:24 Squirrell
So yeah, well done.

00:17:25 Squirrell
Easy A, absolutely worth a watch.

00:17:28 Squirrell
Also has some of the best parents of teenage people out of any film I've ever seen.

00:17:34 Squirrell
They are fantastic.

00:17:36 Squirrell
They are secret weapons.

00:17:37 Squirrell
Patricia Clarkson and Stanley Tookey were the parents and basically made it feel like a separate sitcom to the rest of the movie.

00:17:44 Squirrell
It was so good.

00:17:45 Squirrell
Anyway, number five, Easy A.

00:17:48 Hurst
Good stuff.

00:17:49 Hurst
Good stuff.

00:17:49 Hurst
I did see that once.

00:17:51 Hurst
I haven't seen it since, and I haven't watched this week, so cheeky spoiler there.

00:17:55 Hurst
My #5 was 1990s Ghost, weighing in at 2 hours and 6 minutes, and starring Demi Moore, Patrick Swayze, and Whoopi Goldberg.

00:18:05 Hurst
I've written some summaries for each of these, so let me hit you with some knowledge.

00:18:09 Hurst
A young couple, Sam and Molly, move into an unrealistically nice apartment, whereupon Sam gets shot for being noble and dies.

00:18:16 Hurst
Sam doesn't take it well and becomes

00:18:18 Hurst
He becomes a detective ghost instead of going to heaven.

00:18:20 Hurst
After doing detective work for a bit, he gets annoyed that nobody can see or hear his cleverness, so he goes to a big old phony ghost whisperer called Odamae Brown, who turns out not to be a phony, which surprises her more than anyone.

00:18:32 Hurst
Sam and Odamae tell Molly about the scam involving Sam's best friend Carl and his hired thug Willie Lopez that ended up killing Sam.

00:18:40 Hurst
After a bit of convincing, Molly joins the Scooby gang as the tearful one and they solve the crime.

00:18:45 Hurst
Kill the baddies who all go to hell in an absolutely terrifying style, then Sam can finally go to heaven and put his feet up.

00:18:52 Hurst
That's the summary of Ghost.

00:18:54 Squirrell
That is Ghost.

00:18:55 Hurst
It's a classic film.

00:18:56 Hurst
It's got the bits with the clay modelling.

00:18:59 Hurst
It's got...

00:18:59 Squirrell
It's been parodied so many times.

00:19:03 Hurst
It has been parodied a lot, but it is a great film.

00:19:06 Hurst
I've done some best quotes for each one as well, so...

00:19:08 Hurst
Oh, okay.

00:19:09 Hurst
That's great for this one.

00:19:11 Hurst
I love you.

00:19:12 Hurst
Ditto.

00:19:13 Squirrell
Yes.

00:19:13 Hurst
Because he would never say it.

00:19:14 Hurst
And that's how I eventually convinced her that maybe Sam was with her.

00:19:19 Hurst
No, it was cool.

00:19:19 Hurst
I enjoyed Ghost.

00:19:20 Hurst
I've rewatched it several times and it's still good and, you know, a bit weepy.

00:19:25 Squirrell
There you go.

00:19:26 Squirrell
And Whoopi Goldberg was funny.

00:19:28 Hurst
Really funny.

00:19:29 Hurst
Again, a lot of these ones I've found that it's not the main characters that really hold it all together.

00:19:35 Hurst
They do a great job, but there's usually someone, some character in there who's just brilliant.

00:19:41 Hurst
And yeah, Whoopi Goldberg did steal the show a little bit with her, Odemay Brown.

00:19:45 Squirrell
That also happened to some extent with my number four, Hearst.

00:19:48 Squirrell
My number four is Some Kind of Wonderful.

00:19:52 Squirrell
It's a John Hughes movie, written and produced by John Hughes anyway, but this was back when he wasn't directing them all, so Howard Deutsch.

00:19:59 Squirrell
directed this one in 1987.

00:20:02 Squirrell
It stars Eric Stoltz.

00:20:04 Squirrell
He is probably best known nowadays as the drug dealer from Pulp Fiction who has the needle that goes into Uma Furman's heart.

00:20:10 Squirrell
Mary Stuart Masterson, not really sure what's happened to her.

00:20:13 Squirrell
Lee Thompson, Marty McFly's mum.

00:20:15 Squirrell
Very, very easy to look at.

00:20:18 Squirrell
And a guy called Craig Sheffer.

00:20:19 Squirrell
He's the bad guy.

00:20:20 Squirrell
And it's very much in John Hughes's teen romance universe, but it's a bit moodier and darker.

00:20:27 Squirrell
It's not like dark, dark, but it's a lot

00:20:29 Squirrell
darker than say Pretty in Pink for instance and it's not as you know sweet wrapper covered as some of his better known stuff but John Hughes basically did another love triangle thing but did it much better than he did in Pretty Pink and Some Kind of Wonderful is more about not who's gonna get the girl but whether anyone deserves to get the girl and whether the girl is worth getting just because she is absolutely stunning which she absolutely is and I remember watching it I just over

00:20:59 Squirrell
I remember I was in bed in my bedroom and I had a TV kind of on the wall at the end of my bed, like, you know, the little 14 inch cubes that were TVs.

00:21:07 Squirrell
And it was just kind of on and I missed the first two minutes, so I never knew what it was called.

00:21:11 Squirrell
So I assumed it was called Amanda Jones for Ages because that was the name of the girl in the film after the song by the Ronald Stones.

00:21:16 Squirrell
And but then I eventually found it.

00:21:18 Squirrell
But yeah, it's a great film.

00:21:20 Squirrell
It just made me really happy.

00:21:22 Squirrell
It's really well done, like all of John Hughes's things are when it comes to teenagers, and it's a lot smarter than your

00:21:29 Squirrell
average teen romance.

00:21:31 Squirrell
And there's a guy in it called Duncan.

00:21:33 Squirrell
He's a skinhead.

00:21:34 Squirrell
He is excellent.

00:21:36 Squirrell
He is just hilarious and brilliant throughout.

00:21:39 Squirrell
So, yeah.

00:21:40 Squirrell
You've not heard of Some Kind of Wonderful.

00:21:42 Squirrell
I imagine lots of our rankers haven't heard of Some Kind of Wonderful.

00:21:45 Squirrell
Go and watch it.

00:21:46 Squirrell
It's worth a go.

00:21:48 Hurst
Yeah, thanks for the tip.

00:21:49 Hurst
Good stuff.

00:21:50 Hurst
Literally, my #4 doesn't have that kind of comedy character running the whole thing through.

00:21:56 Hurst
And again, my #4 is not a comedy, much like Ghost.

00:22:00 Hurst
It's classic, though, and it's called...

00:22:04 Hurst
Dirty dancing.

00:22:05 Hurst
I was going to say it's Swayze squeaking in again, is he?

00:22:08 Hurst
Yeah, 1987, weighing in at one hour and 40 minutes, so right in that sweet zone, starring Patrick Swayze.

00:22:14 Hurst
Again, not all of mine had Patrick Swayze in, but he was excellent chick flick bait, especially around the late 80s, early 90s.

00:22:22 Hurst
It's true.

00:22:22 Hurst
Summering.

00:22:23 Hurst
Dirty dancing is essentially what happens when a sheltered girl goes on holiday and accidentally signs up for a crash course in feminism, rebellion and thrusting.

00:22:31 Hurst
Baby arrives at a posh resort expecting polite dinners and maybe a bit of bingo, but instead she discovers a secret underground world where the staff are hotter, the music is better, and everyone communicates exclusively through intense eye contact and dance moves.

00:22:45 Hurst
Enter Johnny, brooding, talented, and powered entirely by hair gel and emotional trauma as a rich girl meets working class boy romance,

00:22:53 Hurst
surprisingly serious sublot involving very dodgy dr, had a lot of people dramatically storming out of rooms.

00:23:00 Hurst
Baby, armed with determination and questionable rhythm, decides she will learn to dance, save the day, and fall in love, preferably all before the end of season talent show.

00:23:08 Hurst
It all builds to one of the cinema's most iconic finales where everyone suddenly becomes a professional dancer.

00:23:13 Hurst
Johnny defies gravity and Baby proves that yes, you can do impossible dance moves if you believe in yourself and have had approximately 3 rehearsals.

00:23:21 Squirrell
Yes, in the water.

00:23:23 Hurst
The story is rich people are ***** to poor people, but poor people are cooler than rich people.

00:23:28 Hurst
So that's dirty dancing.

00:23:30 Hurst
Excellent stuff.

00:23:31 Hurst
Best quotes.

00:23:32 Hurst
Obviously, nobody puts baby in the corner.

00:23:34 Squirrell
********.

00:23:34 Squirrell
She wasn't in a ******* corner.

00:23:36 Squirrell
She was just sat by the wall.

00:23:37 Squirrell
That's one of the most annoying things of the entire film.

00:23:39 Squirrell
It was originally going to be on a square table.

00:23:41 Squirrell
They changed it to a round one.

00:23:42 Squirrell
She's no longer in the corner.

00:23:43 Squirrell
It's ********.

00:23:45 Hurst
Excellent.

00:23:46 Hurst
But the other one, I've heard.

00:23:49 Hurst
Another one I've put in, which made me chuckle quite a lot, is when she first goes into the sexy underground dance world because she's seen something's going on and she's managed to wangle going in there by carrying in a watermelon.

00:23:59 Hurst
And when she sees Johnny and he gives her that kind of shade, rich kid, why are you in here?

00:24:05 Hurst
She says, I carried a watermelon and then just hates herself for it.

00:24:08 Hurst
It's a great line.

00:24:10 Hurst
Like, yeah, you know what?

00:24:11 Hurst
That's pretty epic as well.

00:24:12 Hurst
So that's got into my best quotes.

00:24:13 Squirrell
There you go.

00:24:14 Hurst
Number 4, Dirty Dancing, 1987.

00:24:18 Squirrell
I always thought that her dad was legitimately sensible throughout.

00:24:22 Squirrell
Like he didn't know that it wasn't Johnny who had knocked up Penny.

00:24:26 Squirrell
And that bit, by the way, I remember watching this and I wasn't very old.

00:24:29 Squirrell
They never used the word abortion or pregnant.

00:24:31 Squirrell
I had no idea what was wrong with Penny.

00:24:33 Squirrell
I had no idea what she had done to her or why she was sick now.

00:24:37 Squirrell
She seemed fine.

00:24:38 Squirrell
And then she went away for some medical thing and came back iller.

00:24:41 Squirrell
What?

00:24:41 Squirrell
I didn't get that at all.

00:24:43 Squirrell
But yeah, her dad dealt very really well and he helped Penny out without like asking for anything in returning them when he found out that

00:24:48 Squirrell
He was wrong about Johnny.

00:24:50 Squirrell
He apologised and shook hands with the guy.

00:24:51 Squirrell
Her dad was cool.

00:24:52 Hurst
Yeah, but he doesn't.

00:24:53 Hurst
He says, I'm the kind of person that knows when he's wrong.

00:24:56 Hurst
He never says sorry.

00:24:59 Squirrell
Maybe.

00:25:00 Squirrell
I mean, Swasey did statutory rape his daughter, so I think he has something to go on there.

00:25:06 Hurst
Yeah, I mean, there's that.

00:25:08 Squirrell
Eight years older as well.

00:25:09 Squirrell
That's all pretty easy.

00:25:11 Hurst
You don't worry about the minute show of these films.

00:25:16 Hurst
But yeah, it's a classic film.

00:25:18 Hurst
It's brilliant.

00:25:19 Squirrell
All right.

00:25:20 Squirrell
Number three for me in my top five chick flicks is a sports movie.

00:25:26 Squirrell
It's a sports movie called A League of Their Own, and it is ******* brilliant.

00:25:31 Squirrell
Chick flick or not chick flick.

00:25:33 Squirrell
A League of Their Own came out in 1992, which was, what's that, 34 years ago now?

00:25:40 Squirrell
It was directed by Penny Marshall, who's gone on to have some good success.

00:25:44 Squirrell
And it starred Geena Davis,

00:25:46 Squirrell
vanished, Tom Hanks, who's fairest, Madonna, Lori Petty, Rosie O'Donnell, never mind, not everything could be perfect, and it fictionalises the real story of the All-American Girls Professional Baseball League, which existed during and slightly after the Second World War, because all the boys were off fighting, so the girls had to do the sports to entertain people.

00:26:08 Squirrell
Girls.

00:26:09 Squirrell
And the whole story is about that, for large chunks.

00:26:12 Squirrell
Girls can't play baseball.

00:26:13 Squirrell
Turns out they ******* well can, and they play it

00:26:16 Squirrell
really well.

00:26:17 Squirrell
It's several things at once.

00:26:19 Squirrell
It is a sports movie, it's an ensemble comedy, it's a history of a time when women, I was about to say of a time when women weren't as respected as men, but hey, when hasn't that been the ******* case?

00:26:32 Squirrell
But anyway, like sisterly drama, wartime nostalgia, and Tom Hans basically shouting at women until his face nearly falls off.

00:26:42 Squirrell
Obviously, the famous line for it, there's no crying in baseball, but the whole thing is secretly about how there absolutely is crying in baseball.

00:26:49 Squirrell
And that's fine.

00:26:50 Squirrell
It's not just sports, it's feelings.

00:26:53 Squirrell
And Penny Marshall, the director, became associated with some huge mainstream hits at a time when female directors weren't really being handed many of those opportunities.

00:27:02 Squirrell
And a league of their own grossed 132 million.

00:27:05 Squirrell
dollars worldwide.

00:27:07 Squirrell
Excellent work, League of Their Own.

00:27:09 Squirrell
It's sentimental, but it's not like soppy or soft or whatever you want to call it.

00:27:14 Squirrell
And the women in it are legitimately competitive and funny and good at what they want to do and crap to each other sometimes.

00:27:22 Squirrell
And they're knackered and they're brave and they, you know, there's a big bit at the end.

00:27:26 Squirrell
It's like, who's going to win the finale after one of them gets kicked out of the team and joins the other team that's in the finale?

00:27:32 Squirrell
Oh no.

00:27:32 Squirrell
And yes, exactly what you want, League of

00:27:35 Squirrell
is ******* brilliant, just like the ladies who played baseball back in those days.

00:27:40 Hurst
I think in sports they call it a final.

00:27:42 Squirrell
Well, yeah.

00:27:44 Squirrell
Game 7.

00:27:45 Squirrell
That's the World Series.

00:27:49 Squirrell
The World Series of Baseball in Japan once said, Can we come and join in and America win?

00:27:54 Squirrell
No.

00:27:54 Squirrell
So, yeah, that was nice.

00:27:56 Squirrell
There you are.

00:27:56 Hurst
Well, because they've done that before with Canada and hockey, and then last of them, so they've completed the World Series of Things.

00:28:03 Hurst
I think that's true.

00:28:05 Hurst
You might have to mark us up with that one.

00:28:07 Squirrell
Oh, that's true.

00:28:07 Squirrell
I could perhaps let us know if he watches baseball.

00:28:10 Hurst
He or she.

00:28:10 Squirrell
Oh, yeah, that's true.

00:28:11 Squirrell
We never established that.

00:28:12 Squirrell
Or they.

00:28:13 Squirrell
Yeah, there's so many options.

00:28:14 Hurst
Indeed.

00:28:15 Hurst
So yes, it's a good one.

00:28:16 Hurst
And interestingly, Madonna, not famously good at acting, did a really nice job in the League of their own.

00:28:23 Squirrell
Actress Madonna.

00:28:24 Squirrell
Yes, what?

00:28:27 Squirrell
She was the right actor.

00:28:29 Squirrell
I never really rated her.

00:28:32 Squirrell
Yeah, no, she did a good job in that as May.

00:28:34 Squirrell
And Rosie O'Donnell is Rosie O'Donnelling all over the place, but apparently was the one on of the actresses that was actually very good at baseball.

00:28:42 Squirrell
So there you are.

00:28:43 Squirrell
Anything you see them doing is normally a stunt double, except for Rosie O'Donnell, who did all her own ****.

00:28:47 Squirrell
So there you are.

00:28:48 Hurst
Oh, fun fact.

00:28:49 Hurst
I like it.

00:28:49 Hurst
Sam, it wasn't your first.

00:28:50 Hurst
I might not have guessed that.

00:28:51 Squirrell
No, there you are.

00:28:52 Hurst
Okie dokie.

00:28:52 Hurst
Well, my #3 is coming into much funnier times.

00:28:56 Hurst
1997's My Best Friend's Wedding.

00:28:59 Hurst
Weighing in at one hour and 45 minutes is

00:29:02 Hurst
Just brilliant.

00:29:03 Hurst
I really struggled not putting it higher up, but there you go.

00:29:06 Hurst
Starring Julia Roberts, Cameron Diaz, Dermot Mulroney and Rupert Everett, who we will come back to in a minute because brilliant.

00:29:15 Hurst
The story is Julianne Potter, a successful but commitment shy woman who realises she's in love with her best friend Michael when he announces he's about to marry someone else.

00:29:23 Hurst
Years earlier, they'd made a pact to marry each other if they were still single at 28.

00:29:27 Hurst
Michael leaves a message on her answering machine saying he's marrying a sweet girl called Kimmy.

00:29:31 Hurst
Julianne panics at the

00:29:32 Hurst
thought of losing him for good, convinced he's making a mistake and that she's the one he truly belongs with.

00:29:37 Hurst
She sets out to stop the wedding using a mix of charm, manipulation and desperation.

00:29:41 Hurst
It's just a great film.

00:29:44 Hurst
It gets to business really quickly.

00:29:45 Hurst
There's no unnecessary preamble just to make the film longer.

00:29:50 Hurst
It introduces Rupert Everett as Julianne's gay best friend, George, and honestly, one of my favourite comedy performances of all time.

00:29:58 Hurst
He's suave, but camp, supportive, but brutally honest.

00:30:02 Hurst
He's

00:30:02 Hurst
She's not a main character, but deserved a supporting actor or Oscar because it was the perfect performance.

00:30:08 Hurst
They all deliver great performances.

00:30:10 Hurst
Cameron Diaz's Kimmy is just adorable.

00:30:13 Hurst
Like when she was in Something About Mary and he's like, well, it's obvious why they all love her, not just because she's beautiful, but she's this lovely, carefree character, this free spirit.

00:30:22 Hurst
And once again, she's got that with Kimmy, but it's not like a ****** little, Oh, she's just the pretty girl that he wants to marry.

00:30:28 Hurst
She's got gumption and she is fierce when she needs to be.

00:30:32 Hurst
She's joyful.

00:30:33 Hurst
Just they're all brilliant.

00:30:34 Hurst
Dermot Mulroney plays the main guy, Michael, and he plays the straight man across it brilliantly when there's so many great comedy performances around it.

00:30:43 Hurst
He's just the steady pulse of it.

00:30:45 Hurst
But when you've got the likes of Rupert Everett around you and Julia Roberts getting increasingly bonkers as the film goes on, I love it.

00:30:53 Hurst
It's got slapstick, nuance, cringe, outrage, uncertainty, but ultimately a perfect resolution.

00:30:59 Hurst
It's just a masterclass in romantic comedy.

00:31:02 Hurst
Even the ridiculous scenes, I think, are on the right side of believable, e.g.

00:31:06 Hurst
the karaoke bar, George meeting the family, the lads doing the harmonizing at the wedding on helium, which is just great.

00:31:12 Hurst
It's just little touches like that throughout, the sister licking the ice sculpture of the David.

00:31:17 Hurst
It's like, I don't see what the problem is.

00:31:18 Hurst
It's a sculpture of the David.

00:31:20 Hurst
And it's like, there's a grown-up, you're like, yeah, I get it, but it'll go over loads of heads.

00:31:24 Hurst
It's a great story, well delivered, perfectly accessorized.

00:31:27 Hurst
My best quotes from it, once Julianne has revealed to Michael what she's done, she's

00:31:32 Hurst
says, I'm pond scum.

00:31:34 Hurst
Lower, actually.

00:31:35 Hurst
I'm the fungus that feeds on the pond scum.

00:31:37 Hurst
And he replies, Lower.

00:31:40 Hurst
The pus that infects the mucus that crumbs up the fungus that feeds on the pond scum.

00:31:47 Hurst
Just spectacular.

00:31:48 Hurst
And when Julianne's trying to explain to Kimmy that maybe she

00:31:52 Hurst
She's just too fancy for Michael.

00:31:54 Hurst
Maybe as a food critic, maybe he just wants Jello.

00:31:56 Hurst
And she goes, I could be Jello.

00:31:58 Squirrell
She says, you're never going to be Jello.

00:32:01 Hurst
This brilliant line and the wholesale little prayer for me karaoke scene.

00:32:07 Hurst
Just so, so good.

00:32:09 Hurst
I love that film so much.

00:32:11 Hurst
My best friend's wedding #3.

00:32:14 Squirrell
All right.

00:32:16 Squirrell
Which one would be your choice from the two ladies in the film?

00:32:19 Hurst
Kimmy, on account of she's not a sociopathic psycho.

00:32:26 Squirrell
Yeah, fair.

00:32:27 Hurst
She's also Cameron Diaz in Pete Cameron Diaz.

00:32:29 Squirrell
She is Pete Cameron Diaz.

00:32:31 Squirrell
What?

00:32:32 Squirrell
I don't know.

00:32:32 Squirrell
Is she Pete Cameron?

00:32:33 Squirrell
I don't argue Pete Cameron Diaz was in the mask.

00:32:36 Hurst
Also, but similar time.

00:32:38 Squirrell
That was first Cameron Diaz.

00:32:39 Hurst
That was first Cameron Diaz.

00:32:40 Hurst
Yeah, that was also Pete Cameron Diaz.

00:32:42 Squirrell
Yeah, no, it's a solid movie.

00:32:44 Squirrell
I won't say anything more in case what I want to say comes up in our future.

00:32:48 Squirrell
So let's carry on.

00:32:50 Squirrell
So we're up to #2 already.

00:32:52 Squirrell
Look at us go.

00:32:53 Squirrell
Number two for me is the impeccable Pitch Perfect.

00:32:57 Squirrell
It's from 2012.

00:32:59 Squirrell
It's a movie about girls that sing acapella music and it stars Anna Kendrick, Rebel Wilson, Brittany Snow, Anna Camp and Skylar Astin.

00:33:08 Squirrell
And goodness me, are nearly all of them incredibly attractive ladies to be singing some music at you.

00:33:14 Squirrell
And they're all pretty good at singing too.

00:33:16 Squirrell
And it wasn't meant to be any good, which sounds a bit like a da thing to say, but it wasn't, they didn't really advertise it too hard.

00:33:22 Squirrell
They didn't

00:33:23 Squirrell
it was going to be much of a success.

00:33:25 Squirrell
It only had a budget of 17 million dollars in 2012, man.

00:33:29 Squirrell
So basically low budget somehow you would call that.

00:33:32 Squirrell
115 million it brought in in America alone.

00:33:35 Squirrell
So good job Pitch Perfect and the ladies.

00:33:39 Squirrell
It's also a sports movie and I would die on this hill.

00:33:42 Squirrell
It is a sports movie in the same way that League of Their Own is a sports movie.

00:33:46 Squirrell
It's just disguised as a singing comedy.

00:33:49 Squirrell
They've got training montages, there's a rival team, there's internal politics, there's a

00:33:53 Squirrell
big finale or final competition.

00:33:56 Squirrell
There's a disgraced former champion, there's redemption arcs.

00:33:59 Squirrell
And the only difference is rather than getting into fist fights, they do harmonies, right?

00:34:03 Squirrell
So it's just a sports movie.

00:34:05 Squirrell
I will die on that.

00:34:06 Hurst
I would say you're making some good points, but there isn't any sport in it.

00:34:13 Squirrell
Well, there's competitions.

00:34:15 Squirrell
It depends on how you judge sports.

00:34:16 Hurst
Competition is not the same as sport.

00:34:18 Hurst
Like a Scrabble competition isn't sport.

00:34:21 Squirrell
Yes, true, but does that stop it from being a sports movie?

00:34:24 Squirrell
It still has all the things apart from football, for instance.

00:34:28 Hurst
You could probably sum up every single movie with about 3 plots.

00:34:32 Squirrell
Maybe.

00:34:33 Squirrell
I think it's 12, isn't it?

00:34:34 Hurst
I don't know.

00:34:35 Hurst
I'm just guessing.

00:34:36 Squirrell
Absolutely.

00:34:37 Hurst
Yeah.

00:34:37 Hurst
Okay.

00:34:38 Hurst
Well, anyway, we'll carry on because I like Pitch Perfect.

00:34:41 Hurst
Tell me more about it.

00:34:42 Squirrell
Yes, well, of course you do, because it's really, really ******* funny.

00:34:45 Squirrell
You've got the really quiet Asian girl and you've got Fat Amy, which is Rebel Wilson, who does a lot of the heavy

00:34:51 Squirrell
lifting and says, I didn't expect to like you skinny ******* but I think you've all got fat hearts.

00:34:58 Squirrell
It knows it's ridiculous.

00:35:00 Squirrell
It completely commits and it's brilliant.

00:35:03 Squirrell
Some of the songs in it are absolute bangers.

00:35:06 Squirrell
I actually read the book it was based on, which is also called Pitch Perfect, and it is a non-fiction book about the acapella group.

00:35:12 Hurst
Non-fiction.

00:35:13 Squirrell
It's non-fiction.

00:35:14 Squirrell
The original, the original book of Pitch Perfect was non-fiction.

00:35:17 Squirrell
It was just all about the acapella groups in, you know, the colleges in the USA.

00:35:21 Squirrell
And they are insanely popular, apparently.

00:35:23 Squirrell
They do have groupies.

00:35:25 Squirrell
The troublemakers were based on some people called the Beelzebubs, I think.

00:35:29 Squirrell
There's something Beelzebubs, but I forget exactly what.

00:35:31 Squirrell
Ohio, let us know if you know.

00:35:33 Squirrell
We're dumping a lot of stuff on Ohio's episode.

00:35:36 Squirrell
You got this, I believe in you.

00:35:37 Hurst
Go earn your number one status.

00:35:40 Squirrell
My very favourite bit is right near the beginning where Anna Kendrick, who's alternative of course, because she wears dark eyeliner and more than one pair of earrings at once.

00:35:49 Squirrell
Oh my god, so alternative.

00:35:51 Squirrell
She's looking around all these, I don't know what they do, they have like a little mini fair, don't they, at the universities to say, Come and join our club and stuff like that.

00:35:59 Squirrell
There's one for DJs.

00:36:00 Squirrell
So she turns up and she's reading it and Fat Amy is like, No, no, it's not, it's deaf Jews.

00:36:05 Squirrell
And this guy just stands up and goes, SHALOM.

00:36:12 Hurst
Yeah, it is good.

00:36:13 Hurst
It was very funny.

00:36:14 Squirrell
There you are, number two, second best chick flick of all time in my opinion is 2012's Pitch Perfect.

00:36:20 Hurst
Yeah, very good.

00:36:26 Hurst
At #2, I have 2012's Pitch Perfect, weighing in at one hour and 52 minutes.

00:36:32 Hurst
I mean, we've talked about Love It, but I'm going ahead anyway.

00:36:34 Hurst
Pitch Perfect follows a group of college students who form an all-female acapella singing group, the Barton Bellas.

00:36:40 Hurst
After a rough start and a major setback, they recruit new members and reinvent their style to compete against rival groups in national competitions, aiming to win the championship right from the off.

00:36:50 Hurst
Acapella Universal Music, where they do.

00:37:01 Hurst
And that's all acapella and it goes straight into the treblemakers doing their set at the opening film.

00:37:07 Hurst
So bang, straight in.

00:37:09 Hurst
No preamble, no boring *******.

00:37:11 Hurst
It's right onto the action.

00:37:13 Hurst
As you said, Becca, Anna Kendrick, basically a miserable, selfish, disrespectful pain in the ****.

00:37:18 Hurst
She's very good at music though, good at production and good at mashing up songs.

00:37:21 Hurst
And a girl can seriously sing.

00:37:23 Hurst
Chloe.

00:37:23 Hurst
nice and hot and immediately likeable and a redhead and hot.

00:37:28 Hurst
Did I mention about hot?

00:37:29 Hurst
I think so.

00:37:29 Hurst
She was quite hot.

00:37:30 Hurst
Yeah.

00:37:30 Squirrell
Doesn't she get introduced naked as well?

00:37:32 Squirrell
Oh no, that's just a little bit later in the film.

00:37:34 Hurst
Yeah, she's a bit naked in the shower.

00:37:35 Hurst
She's all right.

00:37:36 Hurst
She's comfortable with all this.

00:37:38 Squirrell
Yeah.

00:37:39 Hurst
You should be.

00:37:40 Hurst
Yes, you're quite right.

00:37:42 Hurst
Aubrey is boring and set in her ways and thinks the Bellas should stay boring and predictable.

00:37:46 Hurst
I quote, we don't stray from tradition.

00:37:48 Hurst
So obviously Aubrey and Becca clash a lot because they're so different.

00:37:52 Hurst
And although they're both a pain in the *** they do manage to get there in the end.

00:37:55 Hurst
Meanwhile, Chloe is lovely and hot.

00:37:58 Squirrell
Aubrey is also redonka hot.

00:38:00 Squirrell
Let's not mess around.

00:38:01 Hurst
She is, but she's also * **** so I'm not including her.

00:38:03 Hurst
Hotness comes from more than just looking hot.

00:38:05 Squirrell
Does it?

00:38:06 Squirrell
So I'm sure we're going to hear about how hot fatty

00:38:08 Squirrell
in just a minute.

00:38:11 Hurst
Well, I'm calling both of them.

00:38:12 Hurst
And also, she's really annoying.

00:38:16 Hurst
So there's also the love thing, which is Becca and Jesse, one of the troublemakers of a sort of relationship.

00:38:21 Hurst
It's really very who cares.

00:38:24 Hurst
Fat Amy, Rebel Wilson for the obvious humour.

00:38:26 Hurst
Stacey, Cynthia and Lily, more of kind of off the wall and sex-based humour.

00:38:30 Hurst
They're a funny team and somehow I still get goosebumps when they get the group back together and they sing that Bruno Mars mashup.

00:38:38 Hurst
It's just shuffing brilliant.

00:38:40 Hurst
But also what you didn't mention, which for me is absolutely mandatory, Gail and John, the not really main characters, but definitely some of the funniest.

00:38:49 Hurst
The ghastly commentary pair whose lives revolve around collegiate a cappella competition.

00:38:54 Hurst
because they're awful commentators and people, but funny as hell.

00:38:58 Hurst
Quotes such as, Nothing makes a woman feel more like a girl than a man who sings like a boy.

00:39:02 Hurst
Then John Wyth, This number is like an elephant dart to the public's face.

00:39:12 Hurst
Great stuff.

00:39:13 Hurst
And then another quote I put, because I loved it, was the, what's his name, the boy, Jesse.

00:39:20 Hurst
He says, Rebecca says, You're drunk.

00:39:23 Hurst
He goes, I'm not drunk.

00:39:24 Hurst
Look at all.

00:39:24 Hurst
You're just blurry.

00:39:27 Hurst
Good stuff.

00:39:28 Hurst
Brilliant.

00:39:29 Hurst
Absolutely brilliant.

00:39:30 Hurst
Totally agree.

00:39:31 Hurst
It's right up there with the greatest of all time.

00:39:34 Hurst
And either way, it's going to be the second best chick flick of all time.

00:39:38 Squirrell
Excellent.

00:39:39 Squirrell
I'm pleased about that.

00:39:40 Hurst
So good.

00:39:42 Hurst
Let's go have a look at our worst, shall we?

00:39:46 Squirrell
So.

00:39:47 Squirrell
Pitch Perfect, officially the second best chick flick of all time.

00:39:52 Squirrell
People describe it as a guilty pleasure.

00:39:54 Squirrell
And it's not a guilty pleasure, it is just pleasure, right?

00:39:58 Squirrell
Forget about the guilt and save all that guilt for Pitch Perfect ******* free.

00:40:03 Squirrell
Oh my god.

00:40:03 Squirrell
2017, directed by somebody called Trish Tsai, I don't care, you're **** Trish.

00:40:09 Squirrell
Pitch Perfect free was...

00:40:11 Squirrell
utterly out of ideas.

00:40:12 Squirrell
Pitch Perfect 2 was teetering on the edge of ideas because it was a film about college students singing acapella.

00:40:18 Squirrell
Pitch Perfect 3 somehow ******* now they're spies who sometimes sing acapella whilst on their world tour.

00:40:26 Squirrell
Fat Amy literally becomes a ******* ninja and starts sneaking around and hanging onto ceilings and beating everyone up.

00:40:34 Squirrell
The fu-

00:40:35 Squirrell
What the **** happened?

00:40:36 Squirrell
It's just so bad.

00:40:37 Squirrell
Stacey's not even in it.

00:40:39 Squirrell
Ridiculous.

00:40:40 Squirrell
Well, she is for like a minute second because apparently she's having a baby and that's why she can't go.

00:40:45 Squirrell
I think she read the ******* script and went, no, bruv, I'm not sticking my name anywhere near this.

00:40:50 Squirrell
Well done.

00:40:51 Squirrell
Alexis Knapp, I believe her name is.

00:40:53 Squirrell
The cast didn't suddenly get bad.

00:40:55 Squirrell
It's just your ******* origin of the story was just completely and utterly gone.

00:41:00 Squirrell
And DJ Khaled turns up as himself and that's all you need to say.

00:41:03 Squirrell
**** you, DJ Khaled.

00:41:04 Squirrell
**** you, Pitch Perfect 3.

00:41:05 Squirrell
for ******** on what is an excellent film.

00:41:08 Hurst
Fair enough.

00:41:10 Hurst
My worst film is Dirty Dancing.

00:41:15 Hurst
2017.

00:41:16 Hurst
Oh, yes.

00:41:18 Hurst
Two hours and 10 minutes.

00:41:20 Hurst
That's right.

00:41:20 Hurst
A full 30 minutes longer than an absolutely brilliant film that never needed remaking.

00:41:26 Hurst
And we have talked about this one, haven't we, in our bleed proofs and remakes?

00:41:31 Squirrell
It has.

00:41:31 Squirrell
It has.

00:41:35 Squirrell
It might have been, but I'll look at, I can't look at it.

00:41:38 Hurst
Actually, but either way, it deserves to keep being brought up as an absolute travesty of a film.

00:41:42 Squirrell
Our first double worst.

00:41:44 Squirrell
I've never, I don't think anything else has managed to get worse than two topics.

00:41:48 Hurst
Yeah, the Dirty Dancing remake is what happens when you take a beloved classic, run it through a committee, and leave it in the tumble dryer for too long.

00:41:55 Hurst
Chemistry?

00:41:56 Hurst
Gone.

00:41:56 Hurst
Magic missing.

00:41:58 Hurst
Iconic moments, somehow both rushed and dragged out at the same time.

00:42:02 Hurst
An absolute cinematic paradox.

00:42:05 Hurst
It's longer, shinier, and somehow way more boring.

00:42:08 Hurst
Like someone thought, you know what, this tight emotional story needs more stuff, none of it better.

00:42:15 Hurst
And then spaffed out a film with absolutely no chemistry, just wouldn't acting, uninspiring, not pleasing on the eye, just naff bad, bad times.

00:42:26 Squirrell
Yeah.

00:42:26 Squirrell
And they sang.

00:42:27 Squirrell
Let's not forget they ******* sang for no reason whatsoever.

00:42:30 Squirrell
Yeah.

00:42:30 Squirrell
That can **** *** too.

00:42:32 Squirrell
That's right.

00:42:32 Squirrell
And that it was in the reboots and remakes because I brought that up and you were surprised to hear that.

00:42:36 Squirrell
So yeah.

00:42:37 Hurst
I had to watch after you ripped on there and that was bad.

00:42:41 Hurst
Good grief.

00:42:42 Hurst
What have you done?

00:42:43 Squirrell
And I don't want to get into body shaming because, oh my God, if anyone's going to get into body shaming, it shouldn't be people like me.

00:42:51 Squirrell
But the girl they had to play baby wasn't Hollywood skinny, which means

00:42:56 Squirrell
means that she looked, compared to all the people around her, quite a big girl.

00:42:59 Squirrell
And I was legitimately a bit worried when the dude in the lift at the end.

00:43:02 Squirrell
I was like, oh.

00:43:02 Squirrell
Also, she really wasn't ******* dancing.

00:43:05 Hurst
Let's face it.

00:43:06 Hurst
She could be a dancer.

00:43:07 Hurst
You need to be dancer.

00:43:09 Hurst
God, she was terrible, didn't she?

00:43:10 Squirrell
God, the whole thing was terrible.

00:43:11 Squirrell
No, I agree.

00:43:12 Squirrell
Yeah.

00:43:12 Squirrell
Two excellent **** films.

00:43:14 Squirrell
It's a good job the rankers don't have to choose between them, because I think they would find it hard if they'd had the misfortune of watching either of them.

00:43:21 Hurst
And you're absolutely right.

00:43:22 Hurst
Pitch Perfect 3 is a travesty.

00:43:25 Squirrell
Absolute travesty, but let us not think about them anymore, Hurst, for it is time for our number one.

00:43:32 Squirrell
Excellent.

00:43:38 Squirrell
1997, Hurst.

00:43:41 Squirrell
Somebody called Jimmy Cameron decided to go and look at a boat.

00:43:45 Squirrell
The ******* best film of all time.

00:43:47 Hurst
Oh, now this is, I might challenge you on this.

00:43:51 Squirrell
Well, you can challenge away, Hers, but then you'll think about the first three quarters of the film and go, yeah, probably.

00:43:56 Squirrell
It's Titanic.

00:43:57 Squirrell
Of course it's Titanic.

00:43:58 Squirrell
Regular listeners of the show will know that I love Titanic and I will defend it to the death.

00:44:03 Squirrell
But just in case somehow you don't know what I'm talking about.

00:44:07 Squirrell
Titanic is directed by James Cameron.

00:44:08 Squirrell
It stars Leonardo DiCaprio and Kate Winslet, and it mixes a fictional romance with the real 1912 sinking of the RMS Titanic.

00:44:17 Squirrell
Famously massive production.

00:44:19 Squirrell
It was 200 million, I think, at the time, the budget, making it the most expensive film ever made at that point.

00:44:26 Squirrell
And of course, it made shittons back.

00:44:29 Squirrell
It was the first film to bust a billion dollars, rightly deserved, because it was superb.

00:44:34 Squirrell
Now I did bust a billion dollars, but it busted a billion dollars

00:44:37 Squirrell
whilst being over three hours long something Hearst hates and that means of course you can't show as many times in the cinema so **** this did a really good job at making its money it's not just a chick flick I accept that it spends quite a long time being a chick flick and then it's suddenly a disaster movie I'm alright with that

00:44:55 Squirrell
Why not, right?

00:44:56 Squirrell
Why not make your film for chicks and have them all happy and then I'll ******* run at the end dies.

00:45:00 Squirrell
And of course, it's kind of epic.

00:45:02 Squirrell
It's a historical thing.

00:45:04 Squirrell
It's a class war melodrama.

00:45:05 Squirrell
It's very impressive.

00:45:07 Squirrell
Technically, it was a juggernaut at the Academy Awards.

00:45:10 Squirrell
It got 14 noms and 11 Oscars, including best picture and best director, as it ******* should.

00:45:17 Squirrell
James Cameron made a date movie and accidentally made one of the best disaster movies of all time off the back of it, and it is your ultimate

00:45:25 Squirrell
chick flicker.

00:45:26 Squirrell
If your idea of a chick flick includes mass death, class politics, industrial negligence, and Cameron time to drown a film crew.

00:45:33 Squirrell
I remember when my father watched this film, he didn't like it because it was too girly.

00:45:38 Squirrell
And he said there was only one good bit.

00:45:39 Squirrell
That was the steam engines.

00:45:41 Squirrell
And I said, but what about the bit with the painting?

00:45:43 Squirrell
And he said, okay, there were three good bits.

00:45:48 Squirrell
Number one best chick flick of all time.

00:45:51 Squirrell
is Titanic.

00:45:52 Hurst
Yes, you've touched upon the reason why I'm going to argue this one.

00:45:56 Hurst
And it's not because it's not one of the greatest films of all time, because it is spectacular.

00:46:02 Hurst
Yes.

00:46:02 Hurst
Funnily enough, when I was watching Dirty Dancing this morning, just to hone in my notes, it finished and you know how Amazon Prime will just start another movie?

00:46:09 Squirrell
Oh, yeah.

00:46:10 Hurst
It started Titanic and about half an hour in.

00:46:13 Hurst
I was like, right, okay, I've got to stop this because I've got a gun with some stuff today.

00:46:16 Hurst
Yeah, and you've got 3 hours of...

00:46:21 Hurst
hours of disaster movic, epic movie.

00:46:24 Hurst
I mean, yeah, it's got a romance story in, but it's not, God, it is a romance story.

00:46:28 Squirrell
I don't think there's any way you can deny it.

00:46:30 Squirrell
The whole film is about Jack and Rose and how they go on the best date ever until it turns into not.

00:46:37 Hurst
Yeah, but it's just not a rom-com.

00:46:39 Hurst
It's not a chick flick.

00:46:40 Hurst
It's not.

00:46:40 Squirrell
It's not a rom-com.

00:46:41 Squirrell
It's not a rom-com.

00:46:44 Hurst
It's just, it's just not a chick flick because it's.

00:46:48 Hurst
It's just it's an epic or it's a disaster movie or any combination of those.

00:46:52 Hurst
It's action and adventure even.

00:46:54 Hurst
It's borderline natural disaster because it happened because of an iceberg.

00:46:59 Squirrell
Yeah, that's true.

00:47:00 Hurst
There's all sorts of things it is, but chick flick, oh, I don't know, because if I thought that that was a chick flick, I'd probably have it close to my number one.

00:47:10 Hurst
If not my number one, because I've considered it and went, No, that's not a chick flick.

00:47:15 Hurst
It's an epic disaster movie.

00:47:17 Squirrell
It is an epic disaster romance movie.

00:47:20 Squirrell
There's no denying that.

00:47:21 Squirrell
It appears on many other people's lists of worst chick flick.

00:47:25 Squirrell
How dare they, Hurst.

00:47:27 Squirrell
Oh, **** those guys.

00:47:27 Squirrell
They're even more people than you are.

00:47:29 Squirrell
And you know that, guys.

00:47:30 Squirrell
What a bunch of idiots.

00:47:31 Squirrell
Either way, Hurst.

00:47:32 Hurst
I just know what they think about that.

00:47:35 Hurst
Yes, hit me with some facts.

00:47:36 Squirrell
Well, now I'm going to have to edit that weirdly.

00:47:38 Squirrell
Anyway, cool.

00:47:39 Squirrell
Why not?

00:47:39 Squirrell
I might just leave the whole thing as it was.

00:47:42 Squirrell
Fact.

00:47:43 Squirrell
James Cameron himself.

00:47:45 Squirrell
got so fed up with people saying how much room was left on the door at the end of the movie that he made a Twitter post of him and his at the time wife who was Sarah Connor off of Terminator and got the actual door from the movie and put it in their pool in New Zealand and it probably sank with just Linda Hamilton on it and Cameron made some kind of remark about Kate Winslet not being as chunky and he and Hamilton divorced 3 months later.

00:48:08 Squirrell
Now I'm not saying that's the reason they divorced.

00:48:09 Squirrell
I'm just saying that is something that happened.

00:48:12 Squirrell
He's a brave man to call Sarah Connor chunky.

00:48:15 Squirrell
Or, in fact, Kate Winslet and Gloria Stewart were both Oscar-nominated for playing Rose.

00:48:23 Squirrell
That's one's really long and one's really short.

00:48:27 Hurst
Yeah.

00:48:29 Hurst
Oscar nominated for the older lady, presumably as well.

00:48:32 Squirrell
Yes.

00:48:33 Hurst
What kind of Oscar would that be?

00:48:34 Hurst
Because it's not Best Actress, it's a supporting, I don't even think she was supporting.

00:48:38 Hurst
I suppose anyone who isn't the main actor could be a supporting actor.

00:48:41 Squirrell
Well, don't forget that Hannibal Lecter won for Best Actor and he was only on the screen for 14 minutes in Silence of the Loud.

00:48:48 Hurst
When did Twitter come out?

00:48:50 Squirrell
When did Twitter come out?

00:48:52 Squirrell
******* years ago.

00:48:53 Hurst
I don't know.

00:48:54 Hurst
I don't think he'd have still had that door kicking around.

00:48:56 Hurst
If he did, he wouldn't have chucked it in a swimming pool because it's an iconic piece of cinema.

00:49:00 Squirrell
I think it's designed to float, right?

00:49:01 Squirrell
I think it's.

00:49:02 Squirrell
Yeah.

00:49:02 Hurst
I think it can't be that first one.

00:49:04 Hurst
I think it must be the second one is the true one.

00:49:06 Squirrell
You are correct.

00:49:07 Squirrell
Yes.

00:49:08 Hurst
OK, good.

00:49:08 Squirrell
We forgot Twitter would have existed back then.

00:49:14 Hurst
Yeah, it's like a twenty-four, ninety-four.

00:49:16 Hurst
Like, I can't believe that, even though I think Squirrel might have known.

00:49:20 Squirrell
Ninety-seven.

00:49:21 Squirrell
I was nine years early.

00:49:23 Squirrell
Twitter was 2006.

00:49:24 Hurst
Yeah, there we go.

00:49:25 Hurst
That's what I called Twitter with no eyes in Twitter.

00:49:30 Hurst
Right.

00:49:32 Hurst
My #1.

00:49:33 Hurst
which I knew wasn't going to be the same as your number one after you talked about Pitch Perfect 3, because you had some disdain for Pitch Perfect 2.

00:49:41 Hurst
Wow.

00:49:42 Hurst
******* love Pitch Perfect 2.

00:49:44 Squirrell
Get him, Rankers.

00:49:46 Hurst
No, because it is, yeah, the original was a better story, but **** me, does Pitch Perfect 2 make me laugh my *** off.

00:49:54 Hurst
Pitch Perfect 2 off of 2015, weighing in at one hour and 55 minutes.

00:50:00 Hurst
Now I know it isn't as good of a story as

00:50:03 Hurst
Pitch Perfect, but it is absolutely funny as balls.

00:50:07 Hurst
Three times defending acapella champions, the Barton Bellas, perform to the President of the United States.

00:50:12 Hurst
Fat Amy has a wardrobe malfunction, accidentally flashing Obama with her floof.

00:50:17 Hurst
They get banned from performing at collegiate level unless they win the world championships, because

00:50:23 Hurst
Obviously.

00:50:23 Hurst
Meanwhile, Becca is sensibly pursuing a career for after college, but is doing it like * **** behind the group's back.

00:50:29 Hurst
Chloe can't let go of being a Bella, but she's still hot.

00:50:32 Hurst
Bit of uncertainty and conflict resolved with schmaltz in the middle, happy ending, standard **** click formula.

00:50:37 Hurst
But it really is funny as **** and has some excellent performances.

00:50:41 Hurst
The whole film is basically nonsense.

00:50:42 Hurst
I absolutely accept that.

00:50:44 Hurst
But it takes all the funniest elements of the first one, then expands them and adds two other crucial elements.

00:50:49 Hurst
Firstly, Becca's boss, Sammy, played by Keegan, Michael Key,

00:50:53 Hurst
of Key and Peele, and that's Sound Machine, plus a cameo from Snoop.

00:50:57 Hurst
Sammy is an absolute arrogant record producer, and Becca's trying to impress him.

00:51:02 Hurst
And he says a line, which I still think is one of the great quotes of any film.

00:51:07 Hurst
He says, My time is like a toddler in a tiara, short and precious.

00:51:11 Hurst
That's so funny.

00:51:15 Hurst
And that whole thing's great, the way his bunch of hipster idiot record producers are dicking about.

00:51:23 Hurst
It's a bit of a **** ***** of the whole record industry.

00:51:26 Hurst
And it's funny that Snoop does pop in there and do a cameo because he's doing a Christmas album, which is hilarious in itself.

00:51:32 Hurst
But more importantly, DAS Sound Machine.

00:51:35 Hurst
When they go to the worlds, they're basically their biggest competition is DAS Sound Machine, who are a sculptured European acapella cyborg group, basically.

00:51:44 Hurst
And they are absolutely tremendous because they use real worldwide acapella groups for it.

00:51:50 Hurst
So the performances are absolutely off the chart.

00:51:53 Hurst
but they really German them up to the max.

00:51:55 Hurst
So when they start singing, they will not control us.

00:52:03 Hurst
We will be victorious.

00:52:09 Hurst
So outrageously over German.

00:52:12 Squirrell
This is how we do it.

00:52:14 Squirrell
Yeah, that's the one.

00:52:16 Hurst
It's just so, so funny.

00:52:19 Hurst
And Gail and John get more lines and action, which is very welcome because they are so god-awfully inappropriate.

00:52:25 Hurst
John kicked off with welcome back, acapella enthusiasts.

00:52:28 Hurst
My name is John Smith.

00:52:29 Hurst
Sitting to my left is Gail Abernathy-McCadden-Feinberger.

00:52:33 Hurst
Well, you saved the June for last.

00:52:35 Hurst
Gail goes, I did, I did.

00:52:40 Hurst
Then Gail says, these girls are working harder than a nun in a cucumber patch.

00:52:48 Hurst
This is like watching a bunch of toddlers try to assemble IKEA furniture.

00:52:52 Hurst
What they're doing, they're trying to compete with Das Sandwiching by doing circus acts and it's absolute bobbins.

00:52:57 Hurst
It's really, really ******* funny.

00:52:59 Hurst
And the whole film just has amazing, amazing acapella performances.

00:53:04 Hurst
Plus it makes me laugh my **** off every single time.

00:53:08 Hurst
So yeah, it had to be my number one.

00:53:11 Hurst
Even though it's not technically as good, it's much funnier.

00:53:13 Hurst
So I let it go.

00:53:15 Hurst
Of course, it's still got all the lovely ladies from Pitch Perfect 2, but hasn't taken it so far as they are secret spies and nothing to do with collegiate singing.

00:53:24 Squirrell
**** all ********.

00:53:26 Squirrell
Stupid Pitch Perfect 3.

00:53:28 Squirrell
Wow.

00:53:29 Hurst
There we go.

00:53:30 Hurst
That is my number one.

00:53:32 Hurst
And you may not like it and you say get 'em rankers, but at least it is a chick flick.

00:53:36 Squirrell
I mean, it is.

00:53:38 Squirrell
It is a chick flick, much like Titanic.

00:53:40 Squirrell
It's just not a good one.

00:53:41 Squirrell
So it was an all right film, don't get me wrong.

00:53:44 Squirrell
It was much better than Pitch Perfect 3, Jesus Christ, but.

00:53:46 Hurst
Nails on a Blackboard is better than Pitch Perfect 3.

00:53:49 Hurst
Yeah, that's absolutely true.

00:53:51 Squirrell
Fact, an estimated fact, me Hurst.

00:53:53 Hurst
Okay, fact, Snoop Dogg was reportedly paid $1 million for 5 minutes of recording, but then he gave it all to a dog charity.

00:54:01 Hurst
Fact, the second, the Green Bay Packers who appear in an acapella off in Freaky Guy's basement requested to be on the film via Twitter.

00:54:12 Squirrell
Yes, they sent a tweet to Elizabeth Banks, who played the commentator lady and was actually the producer of all the shows.

00:54:18 Squirrell
Yes, indeed.

00:54:18 Squirrell
And they did their own singing.

00:54:19 Hurst
Yeah.

00:54:20 Hurst
And they were great.

00:54:21 Squirrell
Yeah, they did a dance routine as well, right?

00:54:23 Squirrell
Yes.

00:54:24 Hurst
Clay Matthews, actual Clay Matthews in Pitch Perfect.

00:54:27 Hurst
How could you not love that?

00:54:28 Squirrell
And Turk from Scrubs and Boyle from Brooklyn Nine Nine were both in that little...

00:54:35 Squirrell
singing group where they hung around to get plunged or whatever.

00:54:39 Hurst
Well, that was in Pitch Perfect One.

00:54:40 Hurst
Turk actually didn't turn up in Pitch Perfect Two.

00:54:42 Hurst
They'd replaced him with what's his name from the boy one, not Beaker.

00:54:49 Squirrell
Oh, Bumper.

00:54:50 Hurst
Bumper.

00:54:50 Hurst
That's it.

00:54:51 Squirrell
So bumper joins the old guy one because he's a husband.

00:54:53 Squirrell
Brilliant.

00:54:54 Squirrell
Wow.

00:54:54 Squirrell
Rankers, there is our top five.

00:54:57 Squirrell
Some glorious films in that top five as well.

00:55:00 Hurst
And some controversy.

00:55:02 Squirrell
And some controversy.

00:55:04 Hurst
At #1, both of us controversial at #1.

00:55:06 Hurst
So how will that go down?

00:55:08 Squirrell
Sort it out, Rankers.

00:55:09 Squirrell
That is literally your job.

00:55:13 Squirrell
So, well, let me get on with that as well.

00:55:15 Squirrell
We discover what we're going to do next week.

00:55:21 Squirrell
No new ones to talk about her, so let's jump straight into spinning the wheel.

00:55:26 Squirrell
Is there anything that you are particularly looking forward to?

00:55:30 Hurst
Yeah, top five guitar riffs I'd quite like to do.

00:55:33 Hurst
Keanu movies would be good, although I'd rather have a bit of time off movies because then Carly can pick some because she has to sit there and watch a lot of stuff that I want to watch for the show when we have a movie you want to see.

00:55:43 Squirrell
Oh yes, I watched 10 Things I Hate About You last night.

00:55:47 Hurst
So did I.

00:55:47 Hurst
Not last night, but.

00:55:48 Squirrell
That's because I remembered is where I got to.

00:55:50 Hurst
It was all right.

00:55:52 Hurst
It was just generic for me.

00:55:53 Hurst
It didn't make my list.

00:55:54 Hurst
Based on the turning of the shrew, wasn't it?

00:55:56 Squirrell
Yes.

00:55:57 Squirrell
Are you ready to give it a spin, Hurst?

00:55:59 Hurst
Yes, let's do it.

00:56:02 Squirrell
The answer is...

00:56:06 Squirrell
no, Carly! Oh no, it's really long, three-hour plus films.

00:56:10 Hurst
Past three, I mean, she goes to watch Titanic.

00:56:13 Hurst
Might be another one, two weeks running.

00:56:15 Squirrell
Two episodes in a row.

00:56:16 Squirrell
Oh, that would be a first.

00:56:18 Squirrell
That would be a first, for sure.

00:56:19 Squirrell
I mean, you say it might be.

00:56:21 Squirrell
*******.

00:56:22 Squirrell
Tune in because another one of my favorite films of all time is also over three hours.

00:56:26 Hurst
Oh man, filmed over three hours.

00:56:29 Hurst
I better go and make her some tea.

00:56:34 Squirrell
*** ****.

00:56:35 Squirrell
Yeah, I can't think who that one is by.

00:56:36 Squirrell
If it's by you, do let us know in the comments or let us know by visiting our Facebook page, which is Top Five Face Off or sending us an e-mail, [email protected] or going on to Blue Sky or

00:56:52 Squirrell
Or leaving a comment on Spotify or any of that stuff.

00:56:55 Squirrell
Just get in, you know how to get into, get in touch.

00:56:57 Squirrell
It'll be fine.

00:56:58 Squirrell
Come on, come on, come on, get out.

00:57:00 Hurst
It'll be fine.

00:57:01 Hurst
Yeah, hook it up.

00:57:03 Squirrell
Yeah, thinking of hooking people up first?

00:57:05 Hurst
Nice.

00:57:05 Squirrell
Let's say someone had shot somebody in the head and it had made such a mess of their wall and they thought, blah, I don't want to clean that.

00:57:13 Squirrell
I'll just cover it up with some arts.

00:57:16 Squirrell
Oh, where could they get their arts?

00:57:18 Hurst
Prison.

00:57:22 Hurst
No, I would suggest that they came and buy one of my particularly big paintings to make sure they cover it all up.

00:57:28 Hurst
And you can get a hold of those either directly to me or through my website, which is doghouseart.co.uk.

00:57:35 Hurst
I do also have an open studio the weekend coming up, which will be the 2nd and 3rd of May in Retford.

00:57:41 Hurst
If you're in the area, do come and see me.

00:57:43 Hurst
I'll be knocking off at 4pm.

00:57:45 Hurst
And if you're around for that, we will definitely go out for drinks.

00:57:48 Hurst
Aside from that, yeah, just

00:57:50 Hurst
Have a little look, see if there's something you like.

00:57:51 Hurst
Or go on my Doghouse Art Instagram because there's more paintings on there than there are on my website at the moment.

00:57:57 Hurst
Working on it.

00:57:58 Squirrell
Oh, he's working on it, Rankers.

00:58:00 Squirrell
And you could also join our Patreon.

00:58:04 Squirrell
That helps us out because you get to suggest stuff that we then have to rank, such as three hour long movies.

00:58:10 Squirrell
I'm just going to say something else about the Patreons.

00:58:12 Squirrell
And of course, several people's favourite bits of the last episode where you doing names in the form of Starscream.

00:58:21 Hurst
What am I doing it as this time?

00:58:22 Squirrell
I haven't given any four, which is perhaps a bit stupid of me.

00:58:25 Squirrell
So just going to, off the top of my head, what I want first is our number ones in the style of an acapella singing group.

00:58:37 Squirrell
Gas chap, gas chap, gas chap.

00:58:41 Squirrell
We got the goodest of Jasmine, the goodest Jasmine and the daft pass.

00:58:49 Squirrell
Daft pass.

00:58:51 Squirrell
Daft pass, da, da, da.

00:58:56 Squirrell
Ohio, on a temporary visa.

00:59:04 Hurst
Just forget everyone.

00:59:05 Hurst
How many was that?

00:59:05 Hurst
Nope.

00:59:06 Squirrell
Nope.

00:59:06 Squirrell
You missed someone who likes Batman.

00:59:09 Hurst
Oh yeah.

00:59:10 Squirrell
Cool.

00:59:10 Squirrell
I'm sure that's going to just sound incredible.

00:59:19 Hurst
Don't see how it could sound anything else.

00:59:21 Squirrell
Well, exactly that has.

00:59:22 Squirrell
I'm sure that won't be a low moment in your life.

00:59:25 Hurst
I'll be pleased for that to be on the internet forevermore.

00:59:29 Squirrell
There we go.

00:59:30 Squirrell
Rankers, don't let him down.

00:59:33 Squirrell
If you want to hear your name acapella'd or said like Starscream or from our Patreon episode the other day said like Darth Vader by me, because everything's a bit backward on our Patreon episodes, then do join our Patreon, our number ones feed, which is limited to 20 people only and will cost you a fiver a month.

00:59:50 Squirrell
Bargain first.

00:59:51 Hurst
That is absolute bogs, mate.

00:59:53 Squirrell
There you go.

00:59:54 Squirrell
But you don't have to pay us money.

00:59:55 Squirrell
You could just tell someone about this show and

00:59:57 Squirrell
And that would also be super helpful.

00:59:58 Squirrell
Or leave a rating and a review.

01:00:00 Squirrell
I don't know if we've had any of them yet.

01:00:02 Hurst
Yeah, could you guys do us a review?

01:00:04 Hurst
Just that would be really nice.

01:00:05 Squirrell
Yeah, not a bad one.

01:00:06 Hurst
A good review.

01:00:08 Squirrell
Yeah, that's important, I believe, for the algorithm, which we must forever feed.

01:00:12 Hurst
Yes, all hail the algorithm.

01:00:14 Squirrell
All hail Megatron, all hail the algorithm.

01:00:17 Squirrell
Uh, right.

01:00:18 Squirrell
Shall we slam this one into reverse and back into a parking space?

01:00:23 Squirrell
Let's do it.

01:00:24 Squirrell
All right.

01:00:24 Squirrell
Well, thank you very much for listening, Rankers.

01:00:27 Squirrell
As always, it is a pleasure to tell you what things are best and what things are not best.

01:00:33 Squirrell
And please rewind this podcast for the next person that comes along and we will see you to the next episode.

01:00:39 Squirrell
Ah, three hour plus films.

01:00:41 Squirrell
Jesus.

01:00:45 Hurst
See you later, Rankers.

01:00:47 Squirrell
Love you.

01:00:51 Harriet
Top Five Face Off is presented by Matt Hurst and Matt Squirrel and produced by Power Storm Awesome Fire Incorporated.

01:00:58 Harriet
For more details and to vote for winner, visit topfivefaceoff.co.uk.

01:01:03 Harriet
Thanks for listening.

01:01:35 Hurst
Does my face look as red to you as it does to me?

01:01:37 Hurst
It's mad, isn't it?

01:01:39 Squirrell
It's powerful red.

01:01:39 Squirrell
I assume it's just lighting issues.

01:01:41 Hurst
Yeah, it is.

01:01:42 Hurst
I mean, I have been in the sun all day, but I am definitely not burned.

01:01:46 Squirrell
Oh, I hope not.

01:01:46 Squirrell
That'd be terrible.

01:01:48 Hurst
I'd be in hospital.

01:01:49 Hurst
I think I'll just read this.

01:01:51 Hurst
Anyway, we're going to go along with it anyway, even though it's wildly distracting for me.

01:01:57 Squirrell
What's been going on, Hearst?

01:02:00 Squirrell
Nothing much since we talked about what have we talked about last time, which I've completely and utterly forgotten.

01:02:07 Squirrell
Nothing much, Hearst, since we've talked about 18-- ******* hell.

01:02:14 Hurst
After a bit of convincing, Molly Joy is the Scooby Gang as the tearful one, and they solve crimes.

01:02:19 Hurst
No, they solve the crime, kill the baddies who all go to hell.

01:02:22 Squirrell
Oh, that was loud.

01:02:27 Squirrell
Do they solve the crime again, but not into your buggy phone?

01:02:33 Squirrell
That's true.

01:02:33 Squirrell
And hey, also true of my #4 Hurst.

01:02:36 Squirrell
Although there was nothing wrong.

01:02:44 Hurst
So Rankers, what you're hearing here is Fonzie realising that Kylie's taken Doug and Eddie to the paddock so they can have a run around and that I'm not around and he's lonely.

01:02:57 Hurst
Charlie's still there with him, but that's not enough for Fonzie, even though he's been to a dog show today.

01:03:04 Hurst
Not sure how I feel about that.

01:03:07 Hurst
The sound machine were excellent as comedy enemies to the Barton Bellas, but bumper, I don't, I'm not sure.

01:03:16 Squirrell
There's a signature meals in it if that helps you.

01:03:18 Hurst
I might give it a watch.

01:03:20 Squirrell
Yeah.

01:03:26 Squirrell
It's Titanic, of course it's Titanic.

01:03:28 Squirrell
Regular listeners of the show will know that I get a boner for Titanic every time I think about it.

01:03:34 Squirrell
That might not stay in.